La, la, la, Dee, dee, dee
A quick drive by to say Im on a new contract. You know the drill—posting light as I come up to speed on the piles of work that need to be done.
Cause you all don’t want my actual writing to suffer, right? Right!
One of Those Self-Indulgent Posts
Ten random factoids about Anthony:
1. I have bad eyes that surgeons repaired over the course of three eye operations. I am thankful it worked, but there are some of my childhood I can’t remember, at all, because of not being able to see and being in pain. With glasses, my eyes are fine now.
2. My first kiss was at a Girl Scout dance. I was a Boy Scout. The cute girl I danced with had no intention of talking. She dragged me to a dark corner and smooched me. Ho-Boy, that was awesome. When I asked for her name, she responded with more smooches. I never saw her again.
3. I took ten years of wine classes, and then developed an allergy to about 90% if the wine on the market. That sucked.
4. I met my wife at work. She was the cutie-pie new hire playing volleyball. She introduced me to her friend saying we should go out. About six months of this everyone realized all the wrong people were going out with the wrong people. And here we are.
5. After my parents divorced when I was a teen, I was homeless for a while. That really sucked.
6. I watched Mt. St. Helens blow up from 28 miles away. We were so close, the sound wave went over our heads and I only heard it after it had circled the Earth. I got sick from the over-pressurization. That really sucked too. I still have nightmares, sometimes.
7. I have a speech problem and an associated learning disability. I spent a long time in therapy, which corrected most of the problems. In many ways, English is like a second language to me.
8. My love of books came from Victoria, my first girlfriend. I was an avid reader before then, but Victoria introduced me to so many good books, it was awesome.
9. I grew up in Battle Ground, WA, named for a battle that never took place. That still cracks me up.
10. I lived in India for six weeks. Other than the getting sick part, it was awesome.
Anthony’s 2011 Writing Year in Review
The Rehabilitated Hack Writer Presents: 2011!
(TRUMPETS)
These posts crack me up because they inadvertently become popular with my blog harem and my other 30.7 readers. I’m like… a guy. Who writes… or something. Perhaps everyone loves my dry, sarcastic wit. Or maybe you’re all expecting me to trip over myself. Or perhaps see this post:
The Wife Unit here. I’m sorry, my husband won’t be blogging any more. He made one snarky comment too many and I brained him with a stainless steel Kitchen-Aid sauce pan. No worries, the pan is okay. The DH, however, needs some time to recover.
Admit it you could totally see that.
But I digress. To talk about 2011, let’s go back to 2010.
Somewhere in 2010 I posted a bunch of story ideas. I was really reaching for some direction. Which story appealed to me? Which one could you see me writing?
2011 I figured all that out. Mainly through the mind-clarification process of editing. Here’s the smattering of stories I was considering:
- That book in which stuff blows up in space
- An epic fantasy novel book about dragons and singing
- A book about high school cheerleaders from Utah battling space zombies (you know you want to read it)
- Death by Decades: every ten years someone tries to kill the main character
- The Baby Dancers: A YA novel about two brothers who travel across the Endless Void to rescue a baby
What I Learned
We’ll in 2011, here’s what I learned:
I have a dozen dozen ideas in my head. And none of them matter if, when I sit down and write, the voicing is not there. I can tell if the writing has a proper voice.
Holy crap. I can see the voicing.
It’s as if I’ve climbed a mountain, and found the Writing Guru, who then handed me the gift of a lifetime. It’s not that these ideas have bad plots, or maybe the main character is not interesting. I start a novel, and I can tell if the voicing is rocking the pages or if it’s stilted and flat. If it’s not there, I move on. I may have wasted 10,000 words. But I know. I know it down to my tosies.
I can’t begin to describe how liberating this is. It’s a ray of sunshine. Chorus of angles. A (REDACTED) with a (REDACTED) while (REDACTED).
Let me give you an example. I sent Super Cassie a plot idea and she about exploded in excitement, demanding the book in her mailbox.
I sat down and wrote two chapters. The plot is wonderful, and the main character is interesting, but the voice of the story is flat. It’s a literary sexless wonder, and I say that with total affection. I’ve put the manuscript aside.
So Tell Us About the Writing Already
Other than my voicing breakthrough, I wrote two books.
One was Stuff Blowing Up in Space. The book needs another revision, but I have plans for this novel, oh yes I do. It’s creative and fun. It’s sexy and the story arc is epic. EPIC I TELL YOU.
The other book was The Lightning Giver.
And ho-boy (ho-boy being a technical term) what a novel The Lightning Giver is. I have a manuscript that, based on my beta readers reactions, is not so much a YA novel as it Weapon of Emotional Mass Destruction.
It scares me. It really does. I’m not sure I can handle making so many people cry.
I have yet to have The Wife Unit read that one, by the way. It will push all her buttons and I don’t really want her to chase me around the house with a Kitchen-Aid pan.
I’m querying it anyway. If it doesn’t bite, I’ll move on. Because that is what I do. Which leads me to…
2012: I’m Still a Relentless, Productive Little Snot
What’s next? Besides querying my latest widely, I have a variety of things whispering to me:
- That Baby Dancer book
- That Dragonsong book
- Some henceforth untitled book about a teen boy breaking into Hell to rescue the girl of his dreams
- A book about a starship pilot fighting for a dying race while trying to come to grips with his legacy
- Rat Princess, the aforementioned book Cassie wants in her mailbox
- A sci-fi idea that keeps bubbling up about a warrior poet or something like that
- Cheerleader zombie fighters!
It’s quite the diverse list. Which is good, Someone told me I should enjoy non-contract writing while I could. I believe that was wise advice. Which leads me to…
Self-Publishing: That Thing I Keep Getting Asked About
People ask me constantly if I am ever going to self-publish.
I don’t wanna!
There are many reasons, but here are three that stare me in the face:
- It will cost me about $3000 to self-publish a book. Yes. 3K. I have editorial standards. I have cover-art standards. Both of these things cost money.
- To do it right, it’s a time commitment.
- I am a social creature, a consultant by trade. I like to talk with people and work with other professionals. I am a professional’s professional. That’s what I do. Writing is already a solitary pursuit. Self-publishing to me sounds like a lonely, lonely road.
With that said, I’ve also been told point-blank to stop screwing around. That there was a market for my stuffs and keeping it locked away was simply delaying my back-list.
Okay. That appealed to my “Just Do It” and see what happens nature.
But I don’t know, folks. The positive thing about being unpublished is I’m “allowed” to explore different genres. I could self-publish something and then want to move in an entirely different direction. Yes, I know all about the use of pen names (don’t ask, you don’t want to know). I don’t have any enthusiasm for publishing a novel under a different name. That’s not me.
I don’t have a line in the sand about self-publishing, but I am leery about spending so much time doing something I might dislike immensely. I am a father and a husband and a writer with a full-time job that is intellectually challenging and satisfying. If ever there was someone who should pursue an agent for Team Anthony it would be me.
Then again, the publishing landscape keeps rolling around. eBooks have torn away from traditional publishing methodologies and the path to readership is divergent.
Color me undecided. Which leads me back to…
2012: I’m Still a Relentless, Productive Little Snot
By the end of 2012 I will have written two novels.
That, my friends, is a bit of the awesome.
Weeeeeee!
Oh, and leaving Facebook for a year? Best. Idea. Ever.
Me and me, and… me!
Me, me, meeeeeee.
One of those posts.
Just a short note to my 37.4 blog readers that I have picked up a new contract. As a consultant, it’s important for me to make sure I engage the client properly and the project is off to a good start.
This means I feel tired when I come home. The poor blog suffers as a consequence.
Now, behold! I ramble!
The general rule with consultants in any given field where businesses hires one to make improvements or fix problems, is that you make money when the economy is good, and you make money when the economy goes bad.
Right now, the economy is bad. When I engage clients, it is important for me that the end result is the client is not only happy, but they can get a breather because things are better.
When things don’t get better, bad things happen.
Someone loses their job. Sometimes it’s more than one person.
Let’s say that person used to buy coffee every day at the coffee shop down stairs.
He’s not the first to go, and the coffee shop feels the pinch.
They let a barista go. It was her only source of income while going to school. She loved that new job, and now it’s gone.
She goes home. She’s never been “laid off.” To her, the boss fired her. It sinks in that she’s going to have to go and live with her parents.
She sits on her loveseat and cries.
The laid off man has technical skills, and he probably can find a job even in this economy.
At a 20% pay cut.
When he is all alone, the wife playing Bunko, the kids are asleep upstairs, he feels like crying, too.
Where am I going with this? Other than being a major downer, that is.
I’m tired when I come home from putting the brain in overdrive. The blog falls off to the side.
And that, my 37.4 blog readers, is a good thing.
Man Cold, Part IV
MAN COLD. I haz it.
Wife Unit Birthday Dinner
Serves either 4 (couple and two growing boys) or 6 adults. Yes, I really am this awesome.
Surf
Wild Alaskan King Salmon (1.75 to 2 pound)
Kosher salt
Fresh ground pepper
Lemon Juice
Cook in 400 F oven until done. Use no other seasonings. If you do, turn in your PNW Native card and move back east with the rest of the unwashed heathens.
Turf
Baked Garlic Chicken
Chicken (with skin) thighs and drumsticks
Season Salt
Old Bay spice
Garlic Powder
Spice the chicken. Cook uncovered in 425 oven for 33 minutes, then set oven 400 F and put salmon in. Salmon and chicken will be done at the same time.
Comfort Food
Pan fried oysters
Medium or large oysters (2 jars or shucked)
½ cup Italian herb breadcrumbs
½ cup flour
Pat dry the oysters with paper towels. Mix the flour and breadcrumbs. Coat the oysters. Do not seasons unless using plain breadcrumbs. Fry in pan in canola oil at medium-high heat.
Salad
Seasonal Spinach Salad
Fresh apricots
Fresh raspberries
Fresh strawberries
2 avocados
Spinach
Candied walnuts
Crumbled blue cheese
Blue cheese dressing
Fresh ground pepper
Theoretically, this can be an entire meal. Mix ingredients in large salad bowl, except the avocado and blue cheese dressing, which is served on the side (most people decline to put dressing on this salad)
Bread
Rosemary round loaf
Sourdough round loaf
Serve with soft, unsalted butter
Wine
Serve with a very chided Louis Jadot Chardonnay or slightly chilled Pinot Noir
Cake!
Chocolate
Cream cheese chocolate frosting (various recipes)
What Kind of Writer am I?
Sometimes I come up with characters that resonate with me, but no plot. The characters sit around, probably sipping tea, coffee or some such, waiting for a plot to show up. When one does, I start writing.
Other times, I have a plot and no characters. There is no distinctive character voice(s) that draws me in to start writing.
At some point, I’m going to have a setting show up waiting for both a plot and characters.
Maybe, just maybe, if I have enough of this going on in my brain, they’ll get together and knock some socks off.
I’m hoping!
Oh, Hey, I Wrote Another Book
I have a specific, honed, editing process. When I finish a novel, I put that sucker aside and do something else for a few weeks.
Apparently, doing something else turned into write another book.
As my 37.3 readers (Google tells me I had more readers via my RSS feed than previously thought) know, I had these various characters, setting and a ton of world building love for a Space Opera novel I was calling Stuff Blowing Up in Space.
After I finished The Lightning Giver, a plot for SBUIS hit me like an exploding nova.
The plot was all I needed, and I completed the first draft last night. DONE.
People, I am officially OUT OF CONTROL. The novel needs a round of edits, but it’s far, far from me just barfing words out on the page. It’s wonderful Space Opera plot with mysterious and sexy aliens, hunky men, and, of course, stuff blowing up in space. Some cuts, some edits, some polishing and that sucker is ready for some query love.
I’ve titled the book The First Casualty of War and it stands alone but also works as the first book in a trilogy. Now I turn back to editing The Lightning Giver while recharging my creative batteries by reading a bunch of books sitting in my queue.
Below you will find the first draft of a query. It needs work, but I was somewhat surprised I could pull a draft query of a Space Opera book in 249 words.
Bad Day for a Shish Princess
Fleet Commodore Philip Connery thought nothing of giving a sish Huntress a ride to the ass-end of nowhere even knowing the mono-gendered sish used sexual attraction to feed on the blood of both enemy and friends. If the odd crewmember arrived paler than normal for his or hers shift, well, that was the price of doing business with the beautiful sish. The sish saved their humans allies in the last war. A ride was the least he could do.
The impromptu mission was going well until they encountered pirates deep in the sish core.
Sent by the Commodore to obtain reinforcements, Captain James Tilbrook was at the end of his options when the surprisingly young and beautiful sish Space Marshal of Aoe Station refused to believe his story.
So he shot her and tossed her into his ship. Now the entirety of Aoe’s forces is out for his blood. Literally.
Sish Princess Leiesha was feeling lonely and resenting her cruel mother, the Queen, when crazy Fleet humans shot and kidnapped her simply because she didn’t believe their stupid story about pirates. Humiliated and trapped on a Fleet warship with empathic humans, Leiesha realizes that far from committing a heinous crime, the humans have saved her life. Someone had poisoned her!
The Commodore, Huntress, Captain and Princess grapple with these random events, but eventually realize they aren’t random at all. Galactic war looms on event horizon and they must come together or perish separately.
Interested?
It’s Shameless the Way We Flirt, Part II
Me: I would like a grande Americano with room, please.
New Hawtie Barista #1: Do you want that cold or hot?
Me: If it’s not hot, it’s not worth doing.
New Hawtie Barista #2: Well if that’s the case, shouldn’t you order two Amercanos, one for each hand?
Me: I like the way you think.
Barista #1: She’s good that way.
Barista #2: I practice.
Me: Okay, make it a… (dramatic pause) …venti.
Barista #2: Now you got it!
Ah, a Holiday of Family, Books and the Pacific Northwest
A few days off for moi, so naturally, I’ve jumped into my ever-growing pile of books while enjoying the company of my wonderful family.
The hidden gem so far has been Initiate from The Unfinished Song series by Tara Maya.
What I was expecting: girly fluffy stuff beneath the girly cover.
What I got: epic fantasy with a distinctive and mesmerizing voice and rich world-building.
I feel the need to review this book. More later.
I’ve also come across the rare book that I had to put down. It had several instances of bad guy play. “He clicked a bullet into the chamber.” Really? Clicked a bullet?
HEAD-DESK.
There’s just no excuse for this folks, none. Even if you don’t live in the US, there are many US writers that can help you with proper firearm portrayal. I could not move past it.
But, Ms. Maya made me forget about that nasty book, she did.
All I need now is some space opera and my reading weekend will be complete.
Ding Novel is Done: A Stroy of Cute Boys, Romance, Kissing, and Lightning
Last night I finished my current work-in-progress, The Lightning Giver.
What an amazing journey! I can’t wait to get it into the hands of my beta readers after my Secret Squirrel Alpha Reader has given it a whirl. The novel needs an editing pass, and I’m eager to get opinions of the work.
The Lightning Giver is contemporary young adult and I wrote it in eight months. By far, this was the most challenging and difficult novel to write. Normally I take four to six months.
What’s the book about? It’s about love, of course! DUH. AND KISSING.
If I had to write a teaser, right off the top of my head, like RIGHT NOW, like, I have not put any thought into this AT ALL (really!), it would be something like this:
Before the accident, Sarah and Brandon were two normal Colorado teens, mostly kind, somewhat self-absorbed, and enamored with kissing each other.
When they kissed their world faded away, and while finding true love at a tender age was sweet and romantic, even a little sexy, the lightning bolt that interrupted their latest suck-face marathon was painful and horrific.
As they wake up from their comas, Sarah and Brandon realize that all they have left of their old life is each other. As the weeks of recovery turn into months and the months turn into years, they slowly realize the lightning strike may just be a warm up for the real trouble ahead.
Yeah, that needs work. It is a tease, though.
Almost
Almost done with the secret squirrel work in progress. I will finish it this weekend.
I survived the emotional turmoil of the latter third of the book.
Barely.
The Blog Harem Needs Feeding
As my decreased post count shows, I’m increasingly not a big fan of talking about myself on my blog. Mainly because I do that everywhere else, ha, ha, ha. Or maybe not so ha, ha, ha.
However, my blog harem is kind of vicious. They have things like knives and fangs. Sometimes both. And lately, I think they have been traveling in pairs. So, here is a writing update:
Work continues on my Secret Squirrel Contemporary YA Book Project(TM), and the novel is 3/4ths done. The book continues to take an emotional toll on me, and the fine height of irony would be if it never sold. Because I am metaphorically bleeding for it.
Also, I have a legitimate fear that the first woman to read this book beyond my Super-Duper Secret Squirrel Alpha Reader (not you), is just going to kill me for being an emotionally manipulative bastard.
Beyond that, creative work on short stories continues, mainly as a defense mechanism for Secret Squirrel Contemporary YA Book Project(TM).
Now I know what you are thinking. You are thinking how did the Blog Harem come to be, Anthony?
I have no idea.
Really.
Swimming with Sharks
Ha!
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2010 in review
The stats helper monkeys at WordPress.com mulled over how this blog did in 2010, and here’s a high level summary of its overall blog health:
The Blog-Health-o-Meter™ reads Wow.
Crunchy numbers
A Boeing 747-400 passenger jet can hold 416 passengers. This blog was viewed about 6,200 times in 2010. That’s about 15 full 747s.
In 2010, there were 105 new posts, growing the total archive of this blog to 604 posts. There were 62 pictures uploaded, taking up a total of 5mb. That’s about 1 pictures per week.
The busiest day of the year was January 5th with 223 views. The most popular post that day was And in strange eons, even Christmas may die..
Where did they come from?
The top referring sites in 2010 were facebook.com, larrycorreia.wordpress.com, jetreidliterary.blogspot.com, twitter.com, and Google Reader.
Some visitors came searching, mostly for grief, kissing, anthony pacheco, cheerleaders gone bad, and if you are looking for a guilty, you only need to look into the mirror.
Attractions in 2010
These are the posts and pages that got the most views in 2010.
And in strange eons, even Christmas may die. December 2008
8 comments
The Pericles Commission by Gary Corby December 2010
60 comments
Kissing Week, Friday: Cookies! July 2009
1 comment
Son of Ereubus by J.S. Chancellor September 2010
4 comments
“…but again truth be told, if you’re looking for the guilty, you need only look into a mirror.” November 2009
Checking In
Work has kept me under several deadlines, and blogging is the first thing to go as my current contract ends. This particular contract had technical issues, most of which I fixed. Personally. Usually on a weekend. Now that is all coming to a close today and tomorrow, and I’ll be back to my babbling, gray-haired self.
On one hand, I’m happy that I can still bust out the technical mojo and get’er done.
On the other hand, I really, really, really need to get back to writing or I will explode with pent-up writing, um, ness.
Next week I’ll be reviewing Gary Corby’s The Pericles Commission. The novelist will find several gems of writer-ery goodness in Gary’s debut novel. Here at Rehabilitated Hack Writerville, we have a fondness for unusual murder mysteries and books with fabulous research. When I get both in one novel I get all excited. So much so, I will be giving a copy away to a lucky blog reader who comments on my review post (thus you have 1 in 9 chance of winning, ha ha)! Tune in next week.
Speaking of book reviews, I talk about them here in Adventures in Writing.
Talk to You Later!
Anthony
The Tale of Two Shorts
Short #1: Despite ending and starting a new contract (one which keeps me busy, busy, busy), I finished my short I’ve referenced in this post.
It took me two rewrites to get it to a point where I was happy. During the last, the story took on a bleak tone despite the Hero Protagonist being an upbeat, happy-go-lucky guy. Poor Arune. I actually feel bad.
Short stories do not come easily for me, but I can see their value as a way to improve my novel-writing. Hitting a limitation of 7,500 words really threw me for a loop and I agonized for hours over what to cut and what to leave. It’s much easier making a 110k novel a 100k novel than it is to make a 10k short a 7.5k short.
But I did it.
Now for those of you volunteering to read it and wondering what it isn’t in your mailbox, I want The Wife Unit to read it first. Mainly because she proofreads, mainly because, well, she’s The Wife Unit. There are some perks, yanno.
So expect it in yer box, soon. Thank you for your patience.
Short #2: I actually turned in another short, to a brand-spanky-new publication, and had a great conversation with the new editor. The short is an except from my novel Bunny Noir, but it stands alone as far as a short story.
The fun thing, though, before I submitted it, I took this chapter and made it dark. Dark and twisted. It was already a bit gloomy, but I felt compelled to bump it up a notch, and the result, I do believe, is delicious. If it passes muster, I can’t wait to see it in print. Who can resist Lesbian Alien Libertarian Gun Nut Fiction?
Man I love writing, love it a lot. Even when I was pulling my hair out, the end result was worth it.
