Find a Doctor with Small Hands and Other Older Guy Advice

“Ow.”

“Ow?”

“My back hurts.”

“What did you do?”

“Near as I could tell, I went to bed.”

“What, did you sleep on rocks or something?”

“No, I have a really comfortable bed.”

The barista looked at me.

I looked at the barista.

“So, how old are you?” she asked.

“How old are you?” I countered.

“Twenty.”

I sighed. “I am You Suck and Give Me My Espresso years old.”

“We sell energy drinks, too!”

Sigh.